Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

TERRIBLE: For starters, we had our field trip to the IMAX and on the bus one of the boys got some dog crap on his shoe (the kids said it was under the seat). Well, he tried to scrape it off on the wheel well by his seat and when he did, his foot slipped and he got it on his ankle. So he put his feet up on the back of the seat in front of him to look at where it got on his ankle and he got it on the seat. Well, when he dropped his feet from the seat he got it on his knee on his OTHER leg. So he turned around in his seat and tried to lay down and see where it was coming from. When he did he got his foot up on the back of his OWN seat and consequently, when he sat back up , he got it on the back of his sweatshirt. One more turn around and he got it on his arm! I spent 20 minutes getting the body fluids kit and some Kleenexes and cleaning this kid up. Felix said she would have just let him sit there, but I was figuring since it was something that could potentially make him sick, we had to ATTEMPT to clean it up the best we could in case of a lawsuit. As soon as we got to our destination, I marched him into the lobby to the restroom and made him clean up the rest of the way while I went and washed my hands!

HORRIBLE: Anyway, the kids were very poorly behaved. Had kids tattling on each other for cussing, pulling leaves out of the plants by the benches outside and slapping each other with them, went into the train tunnel at the park (and got reported to us by a teacher from ANOTHER school), ran ahead of all the parents and teachers off the buses to go to the playscape after lunch. Just AWFUL - and embarrassing.

NO GOOD: To add insult to injury (practically literally) we are sitting and lunch with and the little girl across from us is sitting with her mother. The mom says something to the effect that the girl really loves her teachers this year and the little brat says "Yeah, but I love Felix more." This comes after the "vote" a few weeks ago to make graphs for your favorite subject and most kids voted science...of course they come over and tell me that they voted and Felix is their favorite teacher. I have just about decided to get out of the profession... I am going to work really hard this summer and get my language arts system/book ready to publish. I have to get out of this mess.

Oh and I nominated all the other 3rd grade teachers for Teacher of the Year (the other math teacher won) - I told everyone it was because A) they deserved it, but also B) every year the Lamar award in our district goes to someone who is about to retire or is about to quit -- as if it is an honor for the END of your career. My theory is that if you would give it to people when they are still young enough and get some encouragement by being recognized for a job well done, then they might not be looking for ways to retire early or go to another profession in the first place.

VERY BAD: When we get back to school I had an email from the soccer booster club rep that the cd of pictures I sent her last week didn't have pictures on it and she sent me a list of the ones from my yahoo photos that she wants. I came home STRAIGHT after school thinking that I would get it done quickly, but could not get the email to pull up here at home. SO I called her and got her to list them from her Sent mail. Got back on and started to find them all on my hard drive and the dad-gum burner software was locking up my computer. I finally figured out how to do it 2 hours later and got it done in like 15 minutes --- aggravating!

WHAT ELSE COULD GO WRONG: I got so pissed sitting and messing with the computer that all I could do was mull over the day's events in my mind and got a wonderful, usual negative response from my NON SUPPORTIVE husband instead of "that's ok" "I still love you" I got "I'll just go in and tell your boss tomorrow to not hire you back next year, that you quit" Yeah. ok. whatever @$$hole.

Ended up NOT getting as much housecleaning done as I wanted. T-minus 10 hours until the MonsterInLaw arrives. Expect more whining this weekend.

161.5# today and I got a sub for Friday that has actually done my class before - only 2 things that went right ALL DAY.

Wish list: I am wearing a white button down shirt and my khaki shirt and gator loafers. I NEED a good pair of khaki Dockers - my only khaki pants are cargo-type. Would be fun to have a grosgrain ribbon belt or two, also. OOOOOHHH !!!! SHOPPING PROJECT!!!! :-)

Power Hour

Your Power Level is: 68%

You're a very powerful person, and you know that all of your power comes from within. Keep on doing what you're doing, and you'll reach your goals.

How Powerful Are You?

This is odd to see. Me... powerful? I answered honestly on this quiz and I really figured I would come off as wishy-washy. I am just really tired tonight from cleaning house (alone) to get ready for MonsterInLaw to come visit.

. How anyone can sit on the couch and eat 17 chocolate chip cookies watching tv while another person is scurrying around to clean house for THEIR relative is just beyond me. Still have to do another load of laundry, clean the cat box, sweep the halls, clean the medicine cabinets in the bathrooms, and clean the tvs/computers. MyPoolBoy said he would do the dinner dishes. woopee - I'm underwhelmed.

I cut my hair last night -- after researching my face shape, eye color, body type, etc. I found a medium length style that is not far off from what I've been doing. Also read some more PreppyCafe and got motivated to not dress so slouchy.

.Hitting Bottom and a New Outlook

Well, we went to our usual hangout (MyPoolBoy and Felix and a couple of other teachers) on Friday afternoon before the thing at the library -- right before we left these guys from Pflugerville come in and start playing shuffleboard behind us and start talking to us. As we are finishing our drinks, another round appears - from them, so we HAVE to drink them, ya know? Then they pay out and leave and right when they are leaving ANOTHER round shows up - they had paid for more while they paid out.

So now we have missed Chunk's baseball game, missed our time to be at the library, and I'm getting pretty hooted. I started feeling guilty about the game and the library thing, and then went to the restroom and saw myself in the mirror - I looked like HELL - I had really let myself go the past few weeks - cuz I KNOW I've been depressed.

Anyway, I got down and MyPoolBoy got mad and left and sat in the car, so I said bye to Felix and we came home. MyPoolBoy fell asleep about 2 minutes after we got home, but I took a shower and blow-dryed my hair before going to bed. I woke up SO rested, better outlook and my feet didn't hurt. Actually, now that I think about it, they don't hurt this morning EITHER.

Gosh! I've been SO DEPRESSED! Anyway yesterday I woke up and fixed my hair - NOT in a ponytail- and put on a little makeup. I got all of TrainWreck's prom stuff taken care of, including making him a boutenneirre since he didn't have a date. I also organized all of Thunderduck's college soccer clippings and got a new scrapbook and ALMOST (except for a schedule, 8 digital pictures that I need to print and the banquet stuff) have it done. I mean all I have to do is glue in some pictures! I finished MyPoolBoy's dad's memorial scrapbook except for the obit (which I am waiting to get from MonsterInLaw when she comes down). I also almost finished my college graduation/honors scrapbook except for a copy of my invitation and I thought about making and printing a small version of my diploma.

I'm also not dreading having MonsterInLaw come down for TrainWreck's track meet on Thursday, I've just resolved myself to clean the house and that's it. No dread, no anger, no depression. I really think I just needed to hit bottom and have some time to do nothing but piddle to get myself "rebooted" I am going to probably seriously stick to my 54321 routine again because I have been leaving out the 3 for Me REALLY BADLY and it was wearing me down. I have to put myself before I do something 4 Others and do a Take 5 at home or at work. I had been putting myself last to the point that nothing else was getting done, anyway! Depression is a sucky thing.

ok - so today I have to clean house, take Chunk to baseball practice, print a calendar, do TrainWreck's grad invitations, and do lesson plans - that's a 5, a 4, a 2, another 4, and a 5... gotta do some 1's and 3's! Me and God need to have room in there somewhere. Ok, so I'm off to find some Joyce Meyer and hit the kitchen!

PS - I also haven't gotten on the scale all weekend - not obsessing!

UPDATE: Joyce Meyer today was all about decluttering the negative things and influences from your life. God sure speaks when he has to!

I'm a Morning Person

You Are Sunrise

You enjoy living a slow, fulfilling life. You enjoy living every moment, no matter how ordinary. You are a person of reflection and meditation. You start and end every day by looking inward. Caring and giving, you enjoy making people happy. You're often cooking for friends or buying them gifts. All in all, you know how to love life for what it is - not for how it should be.

What Time Of Day Are You?

This makes sense...since I usually am such a morning person!

Am I Blue?

You Are a Blue Flower

A blue flower tends to represent peace, openness, and balance. At times, you are very delicate like a cornflower. And at other times, you are wise like an iris. And more than you wish, you're a little cold, like a blue hydrangea.

What Color Flower Are You?

I really probably would have pegged myself to be pink, but I'll agree with the I'm cold more than I wish! My husband leaves the A/C on in winter! Now if I could just get that peace, openness, and balance! One more day of TAKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Only the lonely

You Are Likely an Only Child

At your darkest moments, you feel frustrated. At work and school, you do best when you're organizing. When you love someone, you tend to worry about them. In friendship, you are emotional and sympathetic. Your ideal careers are: radio announcer, finance, teaching, ministry, and management. You will leave your mark on the world with organizational leadership, maybe as the author of self-help books.

The Birth Order Predictor

It is odd that this thing is dead-on correct about my traits, but off on the Only child part. I guess part of my upbringing, though, I WAS sort of an only child (at least being the only girl and when I lived with my Grandma) so it may explain why my attributes point towards that. It kind of reminds me of the song "Lonely Boy" from the 70s where the kid thought he was the ONLY one, and ends up being "lonely boy" HMMMM wonder why THAT wasn't my theme song.

News of the day and drama:
TrainWreck had lunch with the track coach at UTPB and interviewed - said he's on the team if he decides to go there.Thunderduck said tryouts with the soccer team looked good for TrainWreck, so the coach of the soccer team is probably going to get him over to fill out paperwork and stuff tomorrow.

When I sent MyPoolBoy a text message about it that just said "utpb track = yes" he called me and asked what I meant. I told him that TrainWreck made the team, the interview went well, and he said he wants to go there. He asked about scholarships, and I told him just the grant package that Thunderduck got was all I know of and he goes off on me bi+ching that we can't afford it, Thunderduck already owes X thousand number of $ (not true, I don't think) and he needs to just come home and forget it if they won't give him a full ride and go somewhere else. I told him that a full ride was out of the question because TrainWreck had not filled out any of the scholarship stuff I gave him to do and it was too late to do any bigger schools and MyPoolBoy gets all pissy. I THINK what may be the problem is that he's been bragging to someone that TrainWreck is going D-1 on a full ride and now he has to eat his words... and he's taking it out on me. Also - Thunderduck was talking to me on the phone tonight after he and TrainWreck got in from soccer practice. He said something about getting the old phone from our account upgrade instead of the new one that MyPoolBoy ordered. I told him it had been YEARS since I got a new phone so he should consider himself lucky. Thunderduck could hear MyPoolBoy griping in the background and he said "oh, great I guess I got him started" I coyly said "correct" and Thunderduck said "I bet you could say PINEAPPLE and he'd get a way to start bi+ching at you out of it" Well I died laughing - cause it is SO TRUE. Later tonight MyPoolBoy came and started the phone argument again, telling me how he was going to tell Thunderduck to take the old phone back, stop griping, and pay for his own phone (The testosterone was flyin' tonight, people!), etc etc I told him that Thunderduck was NOT bi+ching he was just expressing disappointment because I think that he thought he was getting the new one. Again with the griping. I just walked out and did laundry -- it is SICKENING how negative he is. And this is after I told him yesterday that I needed to surround myself with positive thoughts and positive thinking/environment. HE IS THE MOST NEGATIVE INFLUENCE IN MY LIFE - HE RUINED MY HAPPINESS OVER MY SON GETTING TO PLAY 2 SPORTS IN COLLEGE HE RUINED A FRIENDLY CONVERSATION I WAS TRYING TO HAVE WITH MY OLDEST SON AND HE RUINED THE ONLY RELAXATION I HAD AFTER SCHOOL WHILE I WAS TRYING TO GET READY FOR THE TAKS TEST TOMORROW.

btw - the TAKS test is tomorrow.

A BlogThing that is very telling...

You Have Low Self Esteem 72% of the Time

You tend to blame yourself when things go wrong, regardless of whether it's your fault or not. You're anxious to please others and rely too much on their opinions. Learn to please yourself first, and your confidence will soar.

How is Your Self Esteem?

I can't say that I totally disagree with this. I'm gonna add it to my journaling about who I am... I wonder if there are any more that are like this?

Who Am I?

This question was posed on the Oprah show & website on a series that she did about women "letting themselves go." It was meant in two ways - one, that they had gotten unkempt and overweight, but the second was more intriguing - it was what the first instance stemmed from... these women had let go of control of themselves to tend to all the other things (and people) in their lives.

Anyway, I checked out the steps that they took to get it all back together again, and much of it sounds very FlyLadyish! (THIS I can do!) It also reminds me of the old saying "Let go, and let God." I just have to let go of the OTHER stuff, not me!

SOOOO last night I resolved to move my blog feed to my yahoo page where I would remember to journal AND I also LET GO of helping MyPoolBoy with his statistics class - he keeps wanting me to bail him out or whatever, but I just never took stats so I was going through an online video series (13 hours long!) to learn stats so I could help him. NOW I see how ridiculous it was and this morning I am a little lighter in my step. If he fails or gets a W or I it is HIS fault. If he wants it badly enough he will turn off CSI long enough to watch those videos himself.

It also helps that I got a few days off for Easter and the district track meet to give me time to take this at a reasonable pace. On MyPoolBoy's birthday (last month) his father died and we spent spring break at the funeral, etc. 2 weeks later my grandmother that I lived with through high school passed away also. I had 2 days off of school for THAT funeral. And MyPoolBoy's great-aunt died the same day Grandma did, but we couldn't make THAT funeral.

TrainWreck made the Texas Relays in triple jump (no qualifying marks) and so we spent a day in Austin watching him do that. He also just won district in long jump and qualified for regionals in the 400m (that he had never run before!) and medaled in triple jump, mile relay, and high jump. The team missed placing for regionals by less than 10 points. It was heartbreaking because TrainWreck really wanted to triple jump at regionals, but at least he is the alternate, and who knows? maybe something will happen in the next 2 weeks!

More news - Thunderduck got a job at Sears in the automotive dept and is enjoying it, I think. He called the other day and said that the soccer coach wants TrainWreck to tryout with the soccer team on Monday (after Easter). The track coach also emailed and scheduled a meeting with him on Monday morning. SO I DO have some things to take care of for this situation! Transcripts, test scores, a profile sheet for track, and TrainWreck can't find his SS card. At least my dad offered to meet us halfway to pick him up and take him to save us some gas money.

Ok, so back to the question: "Who am I?"
I guess I can start with the basics (but they sound very much like the martyr-roles that I am supposed to be letting go of) I am a wife, mother, teacher, team-mom, scrapbooker, web designer, cat-lover, and family member. Those are the nouns. Maybe next time I can work on the adjectives and dig a little deeper.

My Theme Song - odd

Your Theme Song is Back in Black by AC/DC

"Back in black, I hit the sack, I've been too long, I'm glad to be back" Things sometimes get really crazy for you, and sometimes you have to get away from all the chaos. But each time you stage your comeback, it's even better than the last!

What's Your Theme Song?

Last Words

Your Famous Last Words Will Be:

"Nice doggy."

What Will Your Famous Last Words Be?

This is a riot! I could see myself dying in a freak dog-bite incident at age 119!

What kind of cookie am I?

You Are a Black and White Cookie

You're often conflicted in life, and you feel pulled in two opposite directions. When you're good, you're sweet as sugar. And when you're bad, you're wicked!

What Kind of Cookie Are You?

BlogThings - My Past Life

In a Past Life...

You Were: A Friendly Spice Trader. Where You Lived: Siberia. How You Died: Hung for treason.

Who Were You In a Past Life?