Sold!

Last night Felix and I went to an auction and she wanted to buy a big-a$$ telescope, but she saw some old dude looking at it who was going to outbid her. She was muttering under her breath that he needed to quit looking at it and that he didn't need it because he was too old. I told her he DID need it because he was old and maybe he had lost his reading glasses. So then we started snorting and laughing and causing a disturbance and we got dirty looks from MyPoolBoy and her ManSlave.

Then they had a huge-a$$ fan that Felix threatened to buy and put in her classroom to help her counteract the hot flashes because her a/c won't get down to sub-arctic or whatever setting it is that she thinks is going to make her comfortable. I told her to have at it - I didn't want it because I stay freezing all the time. So they go to put it up for bid and tried to demonstrate how it worked. It didn't. I told her that I needed that fan for MY classroom!!!!! And we started snorting and laughing and causing a disturbance and got more dirty looks from the boys. So we didn't buy that, either.

However, I DID buy a pulpit for 10 bucks at the auction - and, no, I am not going to start my own religion just so I can wear a hat. Actually I plan to make a bar out of it. Mr. Nasty Bear now has a permanent, logical home. I figured I could offer 2 choices at my bar: water or wine. Probably Blue Nun. And I may need some pie plates to take up an offering when we need to go on a beer run. I also plan to get some to-go cups for the bobsled ride to h3ll that I probably will be taking once it is all said and done.

So. I am bad. But I think this is not as bad as the cross-shaped Easter candy I saw at Walmart. 2 varieties - chocolate and grape sucker, which was near the empty PEZ display. Please tell me there were not any Jesus PEZ's or I will fall over.