Wednesday, May 30, 2012

As Young As You Feel

So. Queen B posted a Facebook "game" with instructions that indicate participants are supposed to reply to her post with a single word response that conveys how and/or where we met her. Then we are supposed to copy and repost the same "game" on our own Facebook status so that she can do the same.

Basically, I'm just too freakin' lazy.  However - I will never pass up the opportunity to give someone, especially a family member, a hard time.  Queen B is only 8 years older than I am.   I have all kinds of things I could say about THAT.

Furthermore, I  have a complete and total lack of ability to follow instructions.  So my first thought was to respond with TWO words - tennis balls.  Because in order to meet his bride, my father used the completely unorthodox date-pick-up method of whacking tennis balls over the chainlink enclosure of a tennis court and literally "hitting on" Queen B.

I then decided that I WILL respond with a single word (which incidentally MyPoolBoy is disputing its actual lexicographical existence because spell-check is putting that annoying effing red squiggly line under it).  Also, I will not post the the "game" on my own Facebook  (refer to the aforementioned lack of ability to follow instructions).

Anyway.  The word I have chosen is  CRADLEROBBERY.   I am going to post now and watch the merriment commence!

Monday, May 21, 2012

Say Cheese

I didn't take a lunch to school today, so I took the very adult problem-solving action of cutting in the cafeteria line in front of my students.  As I was attempting to communicate to the sweet lady behind the serving line that I wanted a quesadilla, one of my boys kept saying my name over and over. "Mrs. WTP."
I ignored him.  Again..."Mrs. WTP."
Ignore. Yet again... "Mrs. WTP."
I finally got my tray of food and turned to address his incessant beckoning..."What do you need?"
"Well, I was trying to save you.  Those quesadillas are really gross!"

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Cup of Prevention

After multiple days of feeling under the weather, my housekeeping skills have gone from "lacking" to "nonexistent."  So it was not entirely surprising to me this morning when MyPoolBoy's boot became entangled in the straps of a bra that I had carelessly (as in, I could care less) left at the foot of the bed.  As he propelled forward and unsuccessfully attempted to regain his balance before falling into the door frame in a display of Three-Stooges-like physical comedy, I punctuated his unfortunate ordeal with the hilarious-to-me commentary:  "Booby trap."

I think I may have unintentionally found a way to save money on security systems.  My new enterprise will be called "Second Base Security," and we will keep you ABREAST of your home's safety with 24 hour SUPPORT!