Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Happy Halloween - Crap, this is funny

I should make apple martinis a yearly tradition. I have had MORE fun tonight! First of all, if you don't live in PeytonPlace, you cannot even begin to fathom the magnitude of trick-or-treating on our street. Everyone uses us as Freeload Freeway on Halloween night. Ok, so here's the deal. Everyone in the town and for about 3 neighboring communities around comes down our street to trick or treat. We have an MHMR house around the corner and THEY come every year, too. It is so bad that a few years ago the police put up barricades at either end and don't let anyone but residents drive down it on Halloween night. One year a little girl had a seizure and they couldn't get the ambulance down to her. SO, anyway here are all these people (not just kids) and every year it is a stupid amount of money spent on candy that you can only afford to give each kid ONE PIECE of the cheapest, crappiest candy that you can get on sale with a coupon at Walmart. One year we had 840 kids - I counted!


Anyway, tonight MyPoolBoy and I started passing stuff out about 5:45 and then he went to go get Lurch from football practice, while Chunk set off trick or treating. I had to put WeaselDog and the DonnyCat inside because Weasel was having a shi+fit and Donny was going to attack a Ninja Turtle, I think. Well, by golly when MyPoolBoy got home he started freely pouring apple martinis into a glass for me (I think I had 4). Ok, so anyway I was giving out 4 -5 - 8- 12 pieces of candy at a time to the kids. I pretty much have had it after 15 years. I just don't have the spirit for it any more (we've been "put upon" by TOO MANY PEOPLE for TOO MANY YEARS - go to your own damn neighborhood/town!). Ok, so there I am 1 or 2 martinis into the wind and this not-so- little boy in a Longhorn jersey comes up and says trick or treat /Go UT. I said "you picked the wrong house to say that at, buddy and just for that you're only getting ONE piece of candy!" and I gave him ONE PIECE OF CANDY! Then laughed hysterically about it when MyPoolBoy came back out with my refill. So anyway we were out of candy by 6:58 pm! A new record! I turned out the light and came in and finished my drink and began drunk dialing Thunderduck and Felix about what I did to the poor little UT idiot. I also mentioned to Thunderduck that I ran out of candy before the MHMRs showed up this year. He appreciated that like no one else possibly could.

We also ordered a pizza delivered just out of meanness. I can't wait to see those poor S.O.B.'s try to get down this street!

Yep. This was a good one!

Oh - and MyPoolBoy got the trailer moved to a storage facility today! Woo Hoo! A step ABOVE white trash!

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Rabid Skunk

There was a report that they found a rabid skunk in PompousPasturePond, a country club community here in Peyton Place. I find this hard to believe for 2 reasons:
1) I am sure that rabies and/or skunks are against their strict ordinances, and
2) How did the skunk get past the gate without a visitor's pass for his car?

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Lou Dobbs tonight

I am laying here half-way watching Lou Dobbs on CNN in an interview with this woman from LULAC. I will not beat around the bush when I admit that LULAC pisses me the hell off anyway because they try to turn everything into a race issue. This ignorant woman is arguing that we should not call illegal aliens "aliens" because they are not from outer space -- ok, the word alien didn't mean outer space until the 1940s or 50s, so she needs to go buy a dictionary to keep herself from looking like a fool. Then she goes on to argue that the immigrants that are here illegally pay into Social Security and they will never see a dime of it -- ok, lady, neither will Texas teachers who worked outside of education at any point in their lives -- Lou got her though because he asked her how she got her figures and she said that X number of - get this - UNDOCUMENTED ALIENS have paid into social security and paid taxes. REALLY? If they are undocumented then how do you have proof (I'm guessing if they were undocumented, then they WOULDN'T pay into any federal or state tax/fund so that they couldn't be caught.)

Not Scary

You Are Not Scary

Everyone loves you. Isn't that sweet?
How Scary Are You?

That's why MyPoolBoy walks all over me.

Saturday, October 21, 2006

Pimping yourself out to the psych department and ramen noodles

Spent yesterday afternoon/evening at our favorite place -- Felix and I laughed WAY too much as usual.

Her son in the Navy has volunteered to go to Iraq and she found out this past week -- so she needed a good sorrow-drowning (liquid amnesia). Anyway, one of our friends who didn't know she was trying to avoid talking about it asked her about it and kept asking questions (that she didn't want to think about to answer, ya know?) SOOOO I reminded her that it could be worse (not really, but I needed to get her to laugh) because TrainWreck is currently earning a living by pimping himself out to the Psych Dept. for "Freshman Testing" at $30 a whack. AND I reminded her that Thunderduck contemplated changing his major to zoology because there was an elephant keeper opening at the Dallas/Ft Worth zoo and he could earn an internship there over the summers - good cow!

Huge laughing fit #2 occurred when one of our redneck woman Lucille friends (Mrs.Rodney - a Lucille story there) who tells us how hard she had it growing up when her mother had to fire the housekeeper. She was trying to explain the situation of someone who was having a hard time and was "broke" - down to their last $200. Ok the absolute hilarity of that statement was lost on her, and we started spouting off how many boxes of mac & cheese that $200 would buy and how long could you feed your family with that much money/mac&cheese. That progressed to "NO - RAMEN NOODLES!" Anyway, Mrs.Rodney continues to offer "help" by adding, Oh yes you can get those for 12 cents a package - to which I retorted: NO the generic ones are 10 for a dollar! And the snorting by Felix and I continued mercilessly. So, all told, we figured that you could basically get 2000 packages of Ramen Noodles for $200 and that should count as the bread group (for the noodles) and the meat group (for the little packet of powder crap).

Good cow, we are so easily entertained when we're drunk.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Don't sit by me

Well, we were in the faculty meeting today discussing this grandiose plan to do lock-down drills or evacuate the playground if a psycho shows up on campus. We WERE supposed to go across the street to a vacant lot across the soccer field - 100 yards of free shot aim for the psycho. And I'm like, let's just send a select few out across the field to "take one for the team." Ok, so then I had the whole table laughing so hard they were snorting and I get the typical look like I'm an instigator or something. H3ll, I can't help it if I am naturally a sarcastic riot. Don't let anyone sit next to me if they can't control themselves.

Also learned: don't take the Dalmatian with you in the car to drop off Chunk at the football field for practice -- it's like driving a special ed bus - she is such a tard.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Wow, this is what normal feels like!

3rd day of no guided reading crap -- what a feeling! I came home after tutoring in a good mood, the kids (students) and I had a great day laughing, working hard -- getting everything done -- and I felt well enough to do the pm routine cleaning and got some "to do list" stuff done. I'm sitting here drinking my evening cup of tea after doing a facial and am about to turn in for the evening (and I'm not exhuasted, just a little tired).

Ok so I'm UP a pound but I know it is because I haven't eaten right for over a week (not taking my lunch, not cooking, no breakfast, not enough water) because I've spent every extra minute at school and not taking care of working out or going shopping. No More!

Anyway, I'm going to bed and getting it stated all over again tomorrow!

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

My new favorite RS song

Well, even though I've always been partial to "Just One Kiss" or "I Get Excited" (Rick is a nasty man sometimes -- I love it!) I have decided that I like "Wasted" pretty much as my play-it-to-death song-of-the-month. TRied to download it, but alas, my system doesn't allow me to get iTunes or Napster or ANYTHING! caca

Anyway, I love the lyrics just cuz it sorta speaks to me (the whole idea of wasting your life or whatever, I don't know) -- but the part about "I see your face in every face in my bed" -- ok Rick, how many faces would that be, exactly -- and shi+ I wish it was more than my face, if you get my drift.

OK, I already feel better and have laughed more today just by knowing that my grades got done (without having to stay up late or get up early) and I can TEACH all because I locked up "the book." Made dinner, worked on my computer, and laid out my clothes for tomorrow and started a load of laundry. Even had a good laugh at the weasel-dog because she dances for cheese and she is NOT an ambiturner (Oh, no, the dog is Zoolander!).

Really really motivated to go to work tomorrow though -- cuz I don't hate it!
ALso decided that I am definitely going to get my reading strategies and songs into a publishable form and try to sell it!

OK, going to brush my teeth and see if I can hit the hay by 10pm!

Saturday, October 14, 2006

As if this were a surprise

You Are a Light Pink Rose

You represent sweetness and grace.

Your vibe: Kind and gentle

Falling in love with you: is like falling in love with a best friend

3 pounds behind

Alas I am 3 pounds behind my goal this morning, but I am hopeful that it will get better because I locked the damn guided reading book up on the top shelf in a cabinet at school and I refuse to get it back out until after TAKS.

Thunderduck's friend is home from the Navy (Felix's son), but Thunderduck couldn't get off work to come down here to see him. We got invited to the family get-together this afternoon, so I think we will probably go see him.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Why don't I trust myself?

Ok, I really finally had a breakthrough at school yesterday after my observation. I am still trying to do all this guided reading shi+ and I feel like my kids are not progressing the way they would if I were teaching the way I normally teach. I am known for getting kids that read on Pre-Primer level who are bilingual to be reading on 3rd grade level by the end of the year. I think this whole guided reading thing that was thrust upon us made me feel like admin was saying that it wasn't good enough. Anyway, yesterday after my observation I felt like it went well - the management part of it anyway -- I'm pretty sure the groups went the way that the book suggests, but it FELT bad. Like I was cheating the kids. Oh, sure, I had planned meaningful lessons and had all the materials ready and I was checking on each group, but honestly, I have 3 kids who technically failed 2nd grade and who read at K-1 level who really DON'T need to be reading a K-1 level story silently and having me come discuss it with them for 5 minutes. They are not going to be pushed enough to get onto grade level that way! It is wrong and I know it with all my heart! I know that the ideas in the book are good ones. I sort of do some of them, just not in the "workshop" form. It just doesn't work with NCLB and Texas TEKS/TAKS. It takes a week to go through a TAKS paper that used to take an hour. AND half the kids don't finish it because it is "chopped up" due to the rotations. AND it takes forever to get them all finished/turned in/whatever to grade them. I really miss having the kids grade their own papers because they can see their own mistakes.

Anyway, last night I sat outside Chunk's football practice and just cried. I think part of it was guilt that I wasn't doing a good job, part was frustration at myself for letting admin tell me I wasn't good enough and believing it, part of it was relief -- I won't be spending endless hours planning "busy work" anymore! What are they going to do? Fire me? If they do I've got a back-up plan to write my resources and publish them -- and I have more than just Look-Up Language this year!

Sooooo I listened to Joyce Meyer this morning and clicked on the one about loving yourself (How Flylaydy!). As I listened she started talking about your gifts and not trying to be something your not, but honing what you DO have. That sealed it. I am NOT a guided reading teacher. I AM a good teacher in my own way. That's good enough for God because that's the gift he gave me, so that's what I will be. Maybe I can do the rotations on Fridays only or after TAKS but NOT NOW while I have kids who need ME, not Fountas and Pinnell.

Ok, it's time to get ready for school -
Good, Lawrd my weight - ate some Reese's yesterday because I was starving and frustrated when I got home from school. Then had pizza for dinner at Lurch's football game - what an anniversary dinner - MyPoolBoy was in the pressbox running the clock!

BTW - Lurch had an awesome game - he played both ways and only came off the field for the kick-off return the second half. Boy, was he tired when he got home! No pix, though, the camera's batteries were dead, darnit. Maybe I can download some from the sports photos website.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

70s Music

Here's my theory: some of the stuff to come out of the 70s had to have been written during massive pot smoking sessions. There are 2 reasons I say this - 1) some of the lyrics are less than profound and 2) they go on forever! I'm figuring that some of these folks sat around taking hits and adding on and on and on and on to the song. "Dude, let me write a verse!" "NO dude you wrote the 4th verse -- you can add to the bridge after the guitar solo."

Case in point: "Blinded by the Light" by Manfred Mann

What the h3ll is that song about?


Monday, October 09, 2006

9 am - I'm not working!

Been enjoying this extra day off too much!
So far this morning I have unloaded the dishwasher and done ONE load of laundry. The rest of the time has been spent drinking coffee and playing with my blog settings. Shame on me (oh well).
I DO need to get my reading lesson plan template done and start cleaning on MyPoolBoy's room (Chunk's old room before the older boys went to college). So, I will say that I added favorite music to my profile that includes the "Lucille" cd that I made everyone for the end of the school year last year. Someday maybe I'll get the time to share all the stories behind them, sigh.

Ok, here's the plan:

9:00 Clean MyPoolBoy's room and work on Reading lesson plans
9:30 Do a load of laundry
10:00 Clean some more on MyPoolBoy's room and finish Reading lesson plans
11:00 Do a load of laundry and clean my pink room, start on Writing lesson plans
12:00 lunch
12:30 Do a load of laundry & take Lurch to football practice
1:00 Finish cleaning my pink room and work on Writing lesson plans
2:00 Do a load of laundry and start cleaning our room, plus work on Science lesson plans
3:00 Clean more of our room and work on Science lesson plans
3:30 Do a load of laundry
4:00 Clean the craft room and work on Social Studies lesson plans
4:30 Pick up Lurch from practice
5:00 Do a load of laundry, clean the craft room and work on Social Studies lesson plans

Sunday, October 08, 2006


. I hit my mark on September 29 - exactly 6 weeks from when I set my 6 pounds in 6 weeks goal.

Enjoying the 3-day weekend so far, even though I spent Friday night in bed (felt run down and sick) while MyPoolBoy ran the scoreboard at the football game. Spent Saturday in my pj's and rested up for some housecleaning today. Got all the bathrooms, the kitchen, laundry room, living room, and dining room clean. Got my math lesson plan template done and I have an idea about reading. Probably do that tomorrow when I finish cleaning bedrooms and doing laundry. Lurch has football practice tomorrow - and I think that Chunk does, too.

TrainWreck came down to go to a concert in San Antonio and was spending the night with one of his friends here in Peyton Place -- he only came by to get some stuff he left here and to leave some pictures of him at the last home game.

Gawd, I am old.
He looks so GROWN UP!

Tired...spent a lot of time today reviewing and updating my blog.